Episode 273
Ready or Not: Embracing Imperfect Beginnings
Ever catch yourself waiting for the “perfect” moment before you start something new? In this episode, Shannon and Janine break down how embracing imperfection, self-compassion, and progress over perfection can help you finally take that first step—no matter how messy it feels.
What We Talk About
- 01:45: The myth of readiness—how perfectionism and waiting for the “right time” keep us stuck
- 03:49: Real-life stories about starting new habits and projects; using a “practice” mindset to overcome perfectionism paralysis
- 09:55: Letting go of backlog overwhelm; strategies for progress over perfection in planning
- 11:18: The power of feelings—how self-compassion and embodying confidence help you take action
- 17:50: The four Cs: Calm, Competent, Capable, and Confident—tools for building new habits and self-trust
Key Takeaways
- Waiting until everything is perfect can keep you stuck—tiny, imperfect steps are the key to building momentum and beating perfectionism.
- Treat new habits and projects as experiments, not final exams. There’s no single “right way” to begin.
- Letting go of the need to catch up or finish everything first frees you to start now.
- Feeling good and confident before you act makes it easier to move forward.
- It’s okay to start again, and again—every action is a fresh beginning and a chance for self-compassion.
Bottom Line
You don’t need all the answers to get started. Progress comes from action, not from waiting for perfection. Start where you are, be kind to yourself, and let the rest unfold as you go.
What’s something you’ve been waiting to start? Try taking just one small, imperfect step this week—even if it’s messy. Share your story with us! We’d love to hear how you’re embracing progress over perfection and building new habits.
Connect With Us
- Leave us a voicemail: 413-424-GTGE (4843)
- Comment on social media: @gettingtogoodenough on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube
- Email: gettingtogoodenough@gmail.com
Want More?
- Feeling Good About Good Enough - We talk about how getting comfortable with stopping at “good enough” (instead of chasing perfection) is a journey, but one that’s so worth it. You’ll hear how we each learned to embrace progress, question perfectionist thoughts, and truly feel good about what’s reasonable.
- Start Simple - We explore the beauty and challenge of taking a simple approach to starting something new. We share stories about how starting simple can help you actually get going—even when you’re a perfectionist.
Transcript
Hey, there. Welcome to getting to Good Enough. I'm Shannon Wilkinson.
Janine Adams:And I'm Janine Adams. We're here for practical and fun conversations about living with more ease and way less stress.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yep. We're all about embracing progress over perfection. So grab a tasty beverage and let's get started. Hey, Janine.
Janine Adams:Hey, Shannon. How are you?
Shannon Wilkinson:I'm pretty well. How are you?
Janine Adams:I'm doing just great. It's nice to see you.
Shannon Wilkinson:You too. I do, like, we're, you know, it's taken some time.
We've had some starting and stopping, but we are getting back into this talking regularly, and I love it.
Janine Adams:It's a life enhancing thing for me.
Shannon Wilkinson:It is.
Janine Adams:It is.
Shannon Wilkinson:Which was enhanced by our annual Yahtzee tournament. Our annual Thanksgiving Yahtzee tournament with our husbands.
Janine Adams:I know. That was so fun. I love that we do that every year on Zoom.
Shannon Wilkinson:I know.
Janine Adams:It's the only time I get to play Yahtzee anymore, I guess.
Shannon Wilkinson:Unless we are together and you and I are together in real life. We've played it.
Janine Adams:Oh, yeah. Exactly. Right. And other games as well. We need to do that soon, right? We do. We. We do.
Shannon Wilkinson:You know, it's something that we could start a game.
Janine Adams:Visit a game tradition of playing Yahtzee on a regular basis.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah.
Janine Adams:Something to start. How would we do that, though?
Shannon Wilkinson:What an awesome segue.
Janine Adams:Yeah.
Shannon Wilkinson:We do want to talk about, like, starting things, and.
I wanted to talk about that specifically because I found myself talking about starting something and then like, oh, we should do an episode on that and we should do it now so that we can decide how we want to do things in January, and then we can begin things in January after we've already figured everything out in December, and. And then it, like, get all twisted up and fall over. And then I typically do nothing.
Janine Adams:Right, right. That inclination to wait until you've done all the research or all the stars line up before you actually start something. It's so.
Shannon Wilkinson:It's.
Janine Adams:I. For me, it's really a natural thing to do, but it's not very helpful.
Shannon Wilkinson:No, not at all.
Yeah, I definitely want to feel like I'm, you know, I have it all figured out before I get started or, you know, I have to finish all of these things before I start the next thing, which in theory isn't a bad idea, but can prevent you from starting stuff. And. It'S not always super helpful.
Janine Adams:Right. Absolutely. That's.
It is a bit of a perfectionism thing that pops in a lot of times before getting started on something or finishing Something we've talked. We can talk about that in another time. Yeah, yeah.
But once you get going on something, if you can drop those barriers to getting started and just start is. I mean, it depends on what we're talking about. Right. But if the consequences are low. Then you can actually learn as you go. Right. If you.
If you don't have to have a degree in making paper flowers before you actually start making them.
Shannon Wilkinson:Right.
Janine Adams:Yeah. Not a great. Because I had all the instructions and I read them once, so when I made my paper flowers.
Shannon Wilkinson:But yeah, yeah, but I get what you're saying. Like, you don't have to know everything there is to know about the thing you want to start. To be able to get started. And.
And it's like, you know, it might be kind of a fun experiment to think about what's the least I need to know. What's the least amount of information I need to have before I can take a step forward.
Janine Adams:Yeah. I have to say, when you said that, that sounded a little bit scary to me. Like. The least. I mean, because nothing is the least and is that okay.
But it would be an experiment.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah.
Janine Adams:Yeah.
Shannon Wilkinson:Well. And I think there's sort of different things that we're talking about too.
I mean, you know, if you are wanting to start making something, then you are probably going to need some supplies and you're probably going to need some level of instruction to be able to get started. But then there's also kind of more.
know, starting the next year,: Janine Adams:Right. If you start. If you. If January 1st rolls around and you haven't set any goals, for example, that doesn't mean you can't set goals Right.
In February or whatever. That. Yeah. The start of the year is a real. False. What Starting point for so many things.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah.
Janine Adams:But you feel like January 1st. I do that all the time. I was just thinking about, I'd like to my yoga game again, because I've let it.
I still haven't figured out how to get that going well in my apartment. Like, okay, I'll start January 1st. It's like, no, Janine, you can start today. Yeah, yeah.
Shannon Wilkinson:Well.
And sometimes, you know, you might be able to kind of trick yourself in a nice way by saying, well, you know, you can practice for January 1st now by, you know, kind of figuring out what it is that makes it easier for you. Like, how can you kind of grease the wheels? How can you remove any friction to doing it?
Janine Adams: t idea. It reminds me back in:And I did it in a journal that was not consequential, like somebody had given it to me. It was still the dot grid that I wanted to use, but I got to play with it and try to figure out what might work for me.
,: g bad early on in January, in:It's a little bit like that trick from Mark Forster where you quiet down your reactive mind by saying, I'm not going to vacuum. I'm just going to get the vacuum cleaner out.
Shannon Wilkinson:Right?
Janine Adams:Yeah, right. Once you get the vacuum cleaner out, you vacuum.
Shannon Wilkinson:Right. There's so many examples of when you. How you can reduce the friction and then it just allows you to move forward.
It's the, you know, if you want to exercise in the morning, set your workout clothes out the night before.
And then, you know, when you get up, you can just put on your workout clothes and it makes it so much easier than if you have to get up and think about what to.
Janine Adams:Put on and decide whether or not you're actually going to do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Barry makes treats for Bix and it involves our food processor, which is quite big and heavy.
And I noticed he yesterday morning when I got up, he had brought the food processor out of the closet into the and put it on the kitchen counter, which I knew served as a reminder that it needed to be done, but also taken away that friction. Okay, now it's easy to get started.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah, yeah, I do remember that involved process. I made them when I was there.
Janine Adams:That's right, you did. You know that it's not a small thing to make those treats. Yeah, yeah. Barry has it down pretty to a science now, you know, after all this time.
But that's excellent.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah, but there are so many situations where Perfectionism can make it tough to get started. And setting yourself up where you're actively figuring it out, you're.
You're making, you're moving forward as you're figuring it out is sort of the antidote to that frozen perfectionism thing that keeps you stuck.
Janine Adams:Yeah. And it seems like expectations play into it.
So if you start, if you decide you're going to start before everything is set up and learn as you go along and just giving yourself the credit for what you do accomplish and any variations you have to make based on the fact that maybe you didn't have all the right information at the beginning and being kind to yourself about that and making that part of the process, I feel like that could apply to lots of different things, including the kind of planning and stuff that we tend to do at the beginning of the year.
Shannon Wilkinson:Right, right. Yeah. And it's, it's so funny because, you know, I have clients who are.
Fall into this trap a lot of like, oh, well, I want to, you know, get everything done that's sitting on my desk so that I can have a clean desk and start fresh, whatever, you know, special day is coming up in the future. Yeah. And then it doesn't happen because there's just so much mucked up together in that.
And it's often by this day, I want to feel really good and like I'm on the ball and blah, blah. And to do that, I have to do all these things well.
And the irony is that if you feel like you're on the ball now, it allows you to take the action that you need to take to do the stuff that gets you where you want to go.
Janine Adams:Yeah. Like, right.
Shannon Wilkinson:Feel the feelings. Take the action as opposed to take the actions so that you can get the feeling.
Janine Adams:Right. That sounds a little easier said than done. Do you have a tip on or process on getting those feelings now that you want later?
Shannon Wilkinson:The simplest way to do it is think about how you want to feel when this is no longer a problem for you, or when you are doing things the way you want to be doing them, or on such and such a date. Think about how you want to be feeling. Feel that and then take action from that place. So literally, imagine in your body.
Janine Adams:Yeah.
Shannon Wilkinson:Feel it in your body and then immediately do it.
Janine Adams:Start and then.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yep. Do it from that energy that you create in your body from those feelings.
Janine Adams:Yeah.
It makes me so grateful that I've gotten the opportunity to work with you on stuff like this all these many years, those last decades, because I know exactly what you mean like I can totally. I started feeling it, you know. But I'll say to other people who haven't had the opportunity to this with this kind of work, take Shannon at her word.
Just do it. It's easy. You can't do it wrong. There's no wrong way on this.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah. Well.
And it can be boiled down simply to feel good, feel what it feels like, you know, when you feel capable, when you feel confident, when you feel competent. Feel what that feels like and then take action from that place.
Janine Adams:Yeah. And I remember you're mentioning. You're having me in times past.
Think about a time when I felt that way, like something that I had maybe accomplished that made me feel proud or self confident to conjure up that feeling. Yeah. And that was really helpful. And yeah. Yeah. Those are. That's such great advice. Is that neuro linguistic programming? Is that what you're.
It is practicing.
Shannon Wilkinson:It is, It's a. It's. It's sort of an anchoring thing.
And I mean and it, and it comes from, I'm guessing, sort of a cognitive behavioral therapy avenue of changing your brain so you can change your actions.
Janine Adams:Right. Yeah. Very powerful. And.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah. Yeah. And where we get tripped up is that we feel like we kind of have to beat ourselves up to move forward.
Like you can't be nice to yourself because then you know you're not going to do it or you know, like you've already not done it the way you wanted to. So you should be mean to yourself.
Janine Adams:Right. You don't deserve kindness from yourself because clearly you're not getting stuff done.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah. You don't deserve to feel good.
Janine Adams:Right. You'll feel good later.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah. But that. When you realize that the opposite is true. Like the more you feel good now, the easier it is to move in the direction you want to go.
The better it will be and the easier it will be to start. And you know, we're. We're starting all the time. Like every action is a starting point.
It's not just, you know, I'm starting this project and then I finish this project.
Janine Adams:Yeah. This can be applied literally every day if absolutely. Or desired.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah.
Janine Adams:That's so interesting. It seems like such an easy way to get unstuck. And it's so easy to be stuck in perfectionism and not getting started.
And this scene feels like a pretty. Great thing to try to get. To get unstuck. And then, you know, knowing that. Imperfect starts are okay and. And right. Yeah. And.
And sometimes you think things are going to go to one way and they go another way and the other way is better. Right?
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. I wish I had a really good example of that.
Janine Adams:I know, I know. I was trying to think of one too.
Shannon Wilkinson:Experienced it. Yeah.
Well, so, I mean, this is sort of not exactly the same thing, but as an example, had to have that second shoulder surgery, which seemed like an imperfect situation. I had less pain the day after surgery than I had the day before surgery. So it ended up being a good thing.
And so, you know, you can't always know how things are going to work out.
Janine Adams:Right.
Shannon Wilkinson:And this isn't a Pollyanna, like, it's all for the best or, you know, whatever. Although I do like the phrase, it'll all be okay in the end if it's not okay, it's not the end. Or, you know.
Janine Adams:Yeah, I don't know that I've heard. I don't think I've heard that one. Okay, That's a good one.
Shannon Wilkinson:Yeah, that was used a lot, I believe, in the movie. The. Something. Something Marigold Hotel.
Janine Adams:Oh. Huh? Something Marigold Hotel. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Shannon Wilkinson:Oh, that's funny.
Janine Adams:Yeah. So it's not. It's not like we're just trying to be super positive. These are actually.
This is just sort of reality, right, what we're talking about here.
Shannon Wilkinson:And there is a physiological reason for this because if you're feeling bad. And sort of beating yourself up, you're probably in a bit of a fight or flight mode, which narrows your thinking, which changes, you know, the.
Your biology, your. Your brain changes how it operates. If it is coming from a place of. Of fear.
And when you're feeling calm and competent and capable and confident and just generally good, then it's like all these other possibilities suddenly are open and available to you because you literally, like, your vision opens up. And. Yeah, when you're in fight or flight, your vision narrows on your survival.
When you feel safe and everything is okay, then you can have more awareness. Right.
Janine Adams:And you can feel. The four Cs. Calm, competent, capable and confident. I know, right? I got distracted by that. You can feel that. You can have yourself feel that.
It's not like you have to arrange the world around you to feel so that you can feel like that.
Shannon Wilkinson:You can. No, those feelings are inside of you because you've had some point in your life where you've experienced those, right?
And it may be about something not that important or unrelated or a while ago or whatever, but there's some point where you felt those four Cs. Yeah, I know that's amazing.
Janine Adams:I'm going to apply that. I'm going to apply that right away.
Shannon Wilkinson:Oh, good. Me too.
Because I was just thinking I needed to align all of the stars so that I could do my pre planning for my planning before the next year and I could just do stuff.
Janine Adams:Exactly. It's true. I've got some big projects that I've been only chipping away at, feeling like I need a bigger picture view to figure it out.
And in fact, I was working on a bigger picture view today before we started recording. But now I'm going to try to come at it differently.
Shannon Wilkinson:And I'm excited because as a wise woman once said to me before we started recording, you don't know what you don't know sometimes.
Janine Adams:That's right. You don't know. You gotta get started, baby. Yep.
Shannon Wilkinson:Well, we would love to hear from you, our listeners. How do you get started? Where do you get stuck? You can let us know on social media, on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube. We're getting to Good Enough.
-GTGE. That's:It really helps us a lot, helps other people find us, and helps us keep moving forward with this project that we love doing. So until next time, this is Shannon Wilkinson in Portland, Oregon, and Janine Adams.
Janine Adams:In St. Louis, Missouri.
Shannon Wilkinson:And we hope that Good Enough is getting easier for you. Thanks for joining us on Getting to Good Enough. We hope you heard something that makes your life just a little bit easier.
If you did, leave us a review or share this with someone who's looking for their own version of Good Enough.
Janine Adams:Thanks for listening. See you soon.
Shannon Wilkinson:My. My. For some reason, my. Screensaver keeps coming on while we're talking.
Janine Adams:That's crazy.
Shannon Wilkinson:I know. And, but it's pictures. So it's like my pictures. And so I get slightly distracted by some fun picture of mine.
Janine Adams:It's like a test, like someone's like going through an obstacle.
Shannon Wilkinson:Come back to now.
Janine Adams:Come back to now. That's fun.
